A politician denies sending lewd photos; a detective interrogates a rapper; Cedric and Levi find lightning in a bottle; two Southern gentlemen compliment women; Jordan runs into an old friend; a cop takes things literally.

A gospel group must practice without its coach, a group of warriors celebrate a beheading, a prisoner tries to trick his guard, a young man is confronted for only speaking in catchphrases.

Two black students compete for a cappella supremacy, Andre and Meegan go on their first date, and would-be terrorists get caught up in the food truck business.

An airline passenger has a standoff with a flight attendant, Shaboots and T-Ray deliver a lecture on women’s periods, and a prayer group receives a visit from God.

Season 5 premiere sketches include a football team getting psyched up before a game; President Obama and Luther meeting Hillary Clinton; two men discussing potential threats on a flight; a band of pirates singing a chantey. Also: a trigger-happy cop.

A group of terrorists decries the TSA, Carlito tries to prove he’s the loco-est member of his gang, and Meegan has trouble finding her seat at a movie theater.

Wendell attends a support group for sex addicts, a teacher has trouble calming down a class clown, and two jazz musicians have a scat battle.

Sketches include Stan Lee pitching new superheroes, a man losing his street cred, and a man creating a mnemonic device to remember a parking spot.

A henchman keeps interrupting his boss’s torture session, a speaker at a school assembly discusses his colorful life, and a man tries to prove he’s all grown up.

A detective puts himself in the mind of a perpetrator, a retro action hero infiltrates a villain’s compound, and President Obama addresses the critics within his party.

Sketches include a vampire revealing himself, the thwarting of a serial killer, and a child getting his wish.

A concussed football player cheering his team on, a man accusing his wife of being unfaithful, and a restaurateur scaring away his customers.

A mobster seeking vengeance on someone who wronged him, a baseball player fighting an addiction to unwanted bodily contact, and Family Matters’ Steve Urkel driving a man insane.

Two old women battle with Satan, things go awry when a man goes mattress shopping, and dance club patrons are forced to face the truth about themselves.

A parole officer uses a puppet to connect with convicts, a man in a neck brace attempts to party down, a Nazi officer tells the story of the time he saw Hitler, and Levi goes steampunk.

The survivors of an alien invasion find out whom they can trust, a family comes to terms with a relative’s gay wedding, a couple of racists express some surprising views, a drill sergeant sings an unconventional marching song, and a pop sensation answers questions from her fans.

Some friends argue over whether a new slang phrase is a “thing,” a man learns the truth about his father’s Hollywood past, and the valets come to Anne Hathaway’s defense.

The players in the 2013 East/West Bowl introduce themselves, a suspect landlord searches a tenant’s apartment, and Metta World Peace explores his physical limitations.

A pawn shop customer asks after some suspicious items, Wendell makes a vanity video, and Karim and Jahar go to the gym.

Local news anchors warn viewers about the dangers of “black ice,” Lando Calrissian deals with an admirer, and Metta World Peace gives tips to homemakers.

Meegan gets Andre in trouble, and sensei Doug Duggart teaches self-defense for the ladies.

A guy learns how to buy drugs in public, and an executive tests a speech for political correctness.

A hotel guest is blown away by the Continental breakfast, and a psycho’s victims stay positive.

Homies learn how to go down on a lady, and MVP Ozamataz Buckshank rocks a post-game interview.

The Obamas get intimate, the founding fathers talk gun control, and Metta World Peace makes a wish.

A passenger finds out that he’s far from the first to board, and some breakdancers keep it nooice.

Two slaves try to find a way out of fighting to the death, and a member of a Latin gang proves his toughness.

Two women prepare to fight outside a club, and the Valets wonder why people mess with the Batmans.

A woman confronts her husband on his web surfing habits, a rapper grapples with his hyperactive hype man, and the villain of an epic musical can’t get a word in.

One man’s bikini-clad woman is another man’s mystery, and two friends step up their hat game.

Two gang rivals get inside each other’s heads, and a police officer hones his act.

A tough guy cries in front of his crew, and substitute teacher Mr. Nostrand does not play.

Luther informs Mitt Romney who won the election, and a non-stop party refuses to stop.

Noah really gets into his Halloween costume, and white zombies attack.

Why are there no more rap groups? Keegan and Jordan have an answer.

A biracial boy has penis concerns, and an inner-city substitute teacher takes roll call.

A rescue dog displays a troubling attitude, and Luther provides presidential debate zingers.

Two friends encounter a racist dog in the park, the flamboyant players of the East/West Collegiate Bowl introduce themselves and a dubstep track derails moving day.

A young Barack Obama discovers how inspirational a party can be, and two hitmen get sidetracked.