After Kramer finds the set of the old Merv Griffin Show in a dumpster, he begins to treat his entire life like a talk show. Jerry’s new girlfriend has a priceless toy collection that she won’t let him play with, which leads him to some questionable behavior. George runs over a squirrel with his car, and he’s forced to spend time and money on its recovery. Elaine has to find a way to deal with a new co-worker, whose ‘sidling’ is both annoying and potentially dangerous to her job.

Jerry’s childhood friend “Fragile” Frankie promises to get Jerry a new car because of a show he did for Frankie’s car dealership. George prepares for his weekly call to his parents. Kramer plans his revenge on a company because of the over abundance of catalogs they’ve sent him in the past month. Elaine is back with Puddy, but meets the man of her dreams at the diner and plans to keep Puddy in reserve until she finds out if the new guy can “handle the workload.” Kramer gets deluged with more catalogs and plans to stop the mail. George’s parents cut him short on his weekly phone call. Jerry gets a van and not the Saab he’d hoped for. Frankie reminds him of the childhood dream they had where they got a van a toured the country. George pops in on his parents and reminds his parent’s they didn’t call him back, but they have to leave right away. Kramer bricks up his mailbox, but that doesn’t stop his mail from being delivered. Jerry plans to sell the van; Kramer helps him out with the ad copy that cites interesting trades considered. Kramer goes to the post office to permanently cancel his mail. Newman confesses to him that no one really needs their mail but that there is a greater conspiracy at work. George demands to know what’s going on with his parents; they tell him they are cutting him loose. George isn’t ready for abandonment; he plans to date his cousin as a means of getting his parents involved in his life. Jerry determines that the appeal Elaine finds in her new boyfriend comes from some old commercial that he appeared in. Kramer wants Jerry’s van and offers Anthony Quinn’s old tee shirt as an interesting trade. Elaine wants Puddy back, but is rejected by him. Kramer uses the van to launch his anti-postal campaign. George’s cousin is into their relationship; however, George schemes to have his parents catch him making out with her. Kramer is captured and enlightened by the postmaster general. Elaine’s boyfriend gets his second piece of good news in one day, his TV career has been revitalized and she is taking him back. Jerry must sell the van after seeing what they saw.

Jerry has an encounter with an Exacto knife and ends up having an infusion of 3 pints of Kramer’s blood infused into him because Kramer decided to store his blood. Jerry’s parents buy him sessions with personal trainer, Izzy, who’s going to help him work off his spare tire because they are concerned with his lack of exercise. George decides that adding television and food to his equation will make sex even better. Elaine visits her friend Vivian and is disappointed when Vivian implies that she isn’t responsible enough to watch her son Jimmy, so she works overtime to prove how responsible she is.

Frank is supposed to say “serenity now” every time his blood pressure is in danger of going up. Jerry’s girlfriend gives his Knicks tickets away. She comments that she has never seen him get “real mad.” George gets Kramer to help him fix his parents’ screen door. They remove the old door and Kramer takes it with him. Frank is selling computers; he wants to bring George into his business. Lippman’s boy tries taking advantage of becoming a man at his bar mitzvah by using his tongue while kissing Elaine. Kramer installs the screen door outside his apartment to give his apartment “the cool even breezes of Anytown, USA.” His initial instinct is to quit, but George decides it is finally time to take on his arch-nemesis, Lloyd Braun, whom Frank has also hired to sell computers. When Jerry learns how to get mad, it releases all his other feelings, including caring and another that results in a proposal. Kramer fights with the neighborhood kids of “Anytown, USA.” George tells Elaine she is attractive to the Lippman men because of her “shiksappeal.” The result gets her two Lippman “men” who want to denounce their religion. George hatches a scheme to sell more computers; however, continual use of the phrase “serenity now” has an “impact” on computer sales. The release of emotions from George has an impact on emotional Jerry. Elaine seeks help from a “rabbi” to see if she can reduce her “shiksappeal.”

George’s employer wants to get rid of him, since they now know he isn’t really handicapped and they don’t like him. He has a one-year contract with Play Now that he will make sure they honor by him showing up for work every day. Jerry and George mock the sounds the Jerry’s girlfriend Claire’s stomach makes during the night. Jerry envisions the belly button as the mouth and the sound the stomach makes its voice. Because of the “bump into” Jerry tells Elaine that she is destined to backslide into her relationship with David Puddy, she bets him $50 that she won’t. The next day Jerry discovers that Elaine didn’t go home last night, he accuses her of seeing Puddy. She says the sex they had was an isolated incident. Jerry agrees but the dinner they also had was more of a commitment, he demands that she pay up. Kramer is tired of seeing all his ideas implemented, because all the little day to day incidental things keeps getting in his way and keeping him realizing his ideas. He gets an intern from NYU to help him out with Kramerica Industries; the corporation he had previously setup to develop some of his ideas. With this help he’ll be freed from the day-to-day activities and be able to develop his ideas, such as the oil tanker bladder. Meanwhile, George is fighting the siege mentality that he is encountering at work and Elaine just can’t get Puddy off her mind. No matter what the obstacle, George endeavors to occupy his office. Jerry tells Claire about the voice and she leaves him. The university takes Kramer’s intern away from him. Claire says they can get back together if he won’t do the voice ever again, he decides the voice is worth it. Unfortunately, everyone is tired off the voice. Elaine pays ups and they decided on a double or nothing bet. The intern comes back on his own because he believes in Kramerica. Play Now tries to negotiate with George, but he won’t give in. Later, he offers his office and one of their rubber balls to allow Kramer to test his oil bladder idea. Jerry continues to cash in on his bet with Elaine, who just can’t seem to keep away from Puddy. The big test takes place at George’s workplace where Jerry plans to meet Claire. They try to warn her about the falling object, but all she hears is the voice. The lawsuit that is filed by Claire puts Play Now out of business and George out of his contract.

Not fully recovered from “The Summer of George,” George is using a cane to get around. Jerry might have another shot at NBC, through an appearance on a NBC Showcase that might lead to another pilot. He is also annoyed that lame comic Kenny Bania’s act is working, only because he is following on Jerry’s coattails, a time-slot hit. Bania scores with big laughs and also gets one of Jerry’s ex-girlfriends. George gets a job interview. Elaine is on vacation for a month in Europe with David Puddy. If he’s lucky he won’t “come back in a body bag.” Kramer finds butter is a better protection for his skin after shaving. George is hired for the job because of his use of the cane. They think he is handicapped and of course he takes full advantage of the situation. Kramer’s skin feels so good with butter; he takes to spreading it all over his body. Unfortunately he lies out in the sun where he begins to cook. It’s a long flight back for Elaine and Puddy, who break up and get back together, only to break up again. Newman, reading the cannibalism themed story Alive!, finds the smell of a cooked Kramer appealing. Jerry is informed that Bania is going to follow him on the NBC showcase. George sprains his good leg and Jerry discovers that George is a closet Bania fan. Kramer tries to keep his skin moist but the baked in smell of cooked meat is too much for Newman. George manages to keep up his bluff until he tries to take on some old-timers. Jerry plans to sabotage his own act, surmising that Kenny’s act will also bomb, but Kenny gets the last laugh.

George discovers he has a severance package from the Yankees that should last him about 3 months and he decides that he is going to take the summer off. Jerry is going to the Tony Awards and so is Kramer; whereas Jerry has a real seat for the awards, Kramer has a job as a seat filler. Elaine critiques a co-worker who walks with no arm movements and is accused of being “catty.” Jerry’s picks up his date, only to find out that she has a man living with her. Kramer gets a Tony Award for a musical in which Raquel Welch is the star. Elaine tries to work things out with her co-worker, to no avail. Kramer uses his Tony as a ticket into a place he really shouldn’t be, Sardi’s, where the producers of “Scarsdale Surprise” have a proposition for him. Jerry’s date decides to commit to him. Elaine’s complaints to men about her co-worker only seem to pique their interest in the possibility of a cat fight. Jerry’s girlfriend begins to wear him out; she is always on the go. George suggests that perhaps they team up to handle Lanette. To keep his Tony award, Kramer must fire the non-arm swinging Raquel Welch from the production. Jerry goes on a date and needs George to handle the invitations for Lanette’s party. He is not to skimp, this time. Kramer does his duty and pays a price. A mad Raquel walking down the street gets into a cat fight with a woman who she thinks is making fun of her, Elaine. George gets distracted and slips on an invitation. Twenty-two episodes later the gang is back where they were a year ago, only this time George is the one in a hospital bed.

George watches a bag for a tourist who never comes back, so he starts wearing some of the clothes. Elaine tells Kramer that the stories he sold to Peterman were put into the book. Kramer goes to the book signing, claiming he is the real “Peterman.” George becomes a tourist from Arkansas when he meets a beautiful woman from the tourist bureau on the street. Jerry shaves his chest and worries about it until he discovers his girlfriend likes hairless dogs. Elaine eats only the tops of muffins and she says that it is a million dollar idea, Mr. Lippman, her former boss, decides to start a business. Kramer starts conducting “Peterman Reality Tours” for $37.50 a piece. When the muffin top business doesn’t seem to be working, Lippman asks Elaine for advice. She tells him that he must make the whole muffin and remove the top from the stump, she also demands that he remove the exclamation point from his sign. The stumps can be given to the homeless. Only they don’t want them. In fact nobody wants them. Jerry continues to shave his chest despite Kramer’s warning about hair growth. George “moves” to New York and takes a job with the Yankees. Steinbrenner is led to believe that George is holding down two jobs and makes a deal to trade George for chicken. Elaine convinces Kramer to get rid of her stumps and he convinces Jerry and his girlfriend to take his tour. Jerry’s chest begins itching from hair growth. Elaine hires “a cleaner” to make the muffin stump problem go away.

Elaine gets bad service at a clothing store, so she begins shopping at another similar store. Jerry notices that he is on his girlfriend’s speed dial. Kramer plans for his millennium New Year’s Eve party two years in advance and he has some strange ideas about what life in that year will be like. George is “offered” a position as director of scouting by the Mets. To get the position he must be fired by the Yankees. Elaine flaunts her purchases in front of the store. Jerry obsesses about his position on the speed dial and then he makes it to number 1. Kramer discovers that Newman is planning his own millennium party. George tries to make a big exit from the Yankees organization; however, all his attempts make him look better in the organization. The step-mother of Jerry’s girlfriend’s confronts him over his #1 position on the speed dial. Newman compromises with Kramer about their respective parties, they will be combined; however, he only has one condition, the next century must be “Jerry free.” Elaine discovers the clothing store she began frequenting is owned by the same woman who didn’t help her at the other store. Kramer reluctantly agrees but then has misgivings and gets Elaine to come back to his party. Elaine plans her revenge on the store with Kramer’s help. Jerry gets caught in the middle of a speed dial war between his girlfriend and step-mother.

George’s girlfriend is big on using the phrase “yada yada”; Jerry says at least she is succinct. Jerry’s dentist just became Jewish and he is already making jokes that make Jerry uncomfortable. Kramer and Mickey double date but they can’t decide which of the women is right for them. Elaine is a character reference for a couple who is trying to adopt; a story she tells during the interview destroys all hope of adoption. George drops by Jerry’s dental appointment. Mickey and Kramer continue to fight over who gets Karen or Julie. George determines that his girlfriend might be leaving out some significant details with her overuse of the phrase “yada yada.” He gets her to fill in the details and discovers more than he wants to know. Jerry confesses to a priest about what he thinks about Tim’s conversion. George drops by Jerry’s confession. Kramer decides on the right woman and Mickey also decides to make his a commitment. Tim hears about Jerry’s dental joke. After hearing Jerry’s complaints about Tim, Kramer accuses Jerry of being an “anti-dentite.” Elaine lobbies on behalf of Beth and Arnie and makes a sacrifice to try getting them a child. Meanwhile, Beth comes to Jerry for help when her marriage is falling apart. It does and she accompanies Jerry to Mickey’s wedding where she reveals an unknown side of her personality.

George is tired and needs to take a nap while at work; he finds the perfect place, under his desk. Kramer has taken up swimming, but he finds the pool too constricting for his needs; he begins swimming in the East River. Elaine’s date is worried about his back and hers; he sends her a mattress and she gets the wrong idea. She gives the mattress to Kramer. Jerry is getting new kitchen cabinets, but the contractor is constantly asking him questions. George gets Jerry’s contractor to make some modifications for his desk, including space for an alarm clock. Steinbrenner is in George’s office looking for him; he decides to wait for George to return. George gets Jerry to phone in a bomb threat in an effort to get Steinbrenner out of his office. After finding George under the desk, Steinbrenner thinks he has ESP and would be perfect to meet the terrorist’s demand of a fitted hat day. Meanwhile, Jerry’s contractor, left on his own, has made a change in Jerry’s kitchen that no one likes. Elaine gets her mattress back when she gets the right idea; however, Kramer has fouled it up with the stench of the East River. Elaine’s boyfriend discovers the benefits of swimming in the East River. Steinbrenner hears a ticking sound in George’s office, thinks it’s a bomb and calls in the bomb squad. Jerry decides he needs his old kitchen back. Elaine throws her back out trying to get rid of the mattress. Kramer’s river gets crowded and George finds a new place to nap.

A woman mistakes George for her boyfriend Neil, a guy who looks just like him. This intrigues George; he wants to meet Neil. Jerry is going to Florida to help his parents move. Kramer asks him to pick up some Cubans from his cigar guy and also gives him a T-shirt. Elaine and her boyfriend see “The English Patient”; she absolutely hates it and that makes her unpopular and dumped. Jerry’s dad gets the T-shirt, #1 Dad, that he is very proud to wear, despite its small size. At his parents’ exercise room, Jerry meets Izzy, an 80-year-old man who can’t stand to lose; he challenges Jerry to a weightlifting competition; “It’s go time!” He throws his back out again and again. Kramer’s Cubans arrive; they’re real people and not the cigars that Jerry thought he would be getting. George is overly obsessed with Neil, to the point where he is missing out on Danielle. Jerry is back in New York, where Izzy has returned to see a back specialist. Though Kramer’s Cubans are really Dominicans he tries to pass them off as “Cubans” anyway; it doesn’t work. Elaine’s dislike for the film alienates her from everyone. When she tells Peterman that she hasn’t seen the film, he immediately takes steps to correct the situation. Jerry meets the rest of Izzy’s family all of who are fiercely competitive. He finds work for Kramer’s “Cubans.” Elaine still hates the movie, but must go to the Tunisian desert to live in a cave to save her job. Kramer thinks his unemployed Dominicans, whom he educated about communism, are planning to revolt; later they do. George gets a last word on Neil when Danielle makes a decision between the two of them.

Elaine wants to have some Chinese food delivered, but lives just outside the delivery zone. In order to fool the delivery man, she pretends that the janitor closet in the building across the street is her apartment. The trouble is the landlady mistakes her for the janitor. Kramer joins the “adopt a highway” program, but his methods are a little unorthodox. Jerry’s new girlfriend uses a toothbrush that had fallen into the toilet, which causes him more trouble than he could have imagined. George loses his keys, and by the time he finds them, they’re buried at the bottom of recently filled pothole.

Kramer decides that daylight saving time isn’t coming fast enough, so he sets his watch ahead an hour. Mike, the guy who once referred to Jerry as “a phony,” has become a bookie. Peggy, a co-worker of Elaine’s calls her “Susie.” George is excited about Steinbrenner’s ball. He hopes to show off his tall blonde girlfriend with a grand entrance. Instead, she says she wants to talk. He runs away. “If she can’t find me, she can’t break up with me.” He really wants to make that big entrance at the ball. Kramer tells Jerry that he owes Mike $100 for a bet he made on that night’s Knicks game. Only Jerry never made the bet; Kramer did it for him. In fact, Kramer attends the game and gets into a fight with a key player that causes Jerry to win his bet. Peggy starts talking to “Susie” about Elaine’s memo. Peterman hearing about the complaints demands to see Elaine, Peggy and “Susie” in his office; first thing in the morning. Mike can’t pay Jerry, so he offers to help him with his trunk problem, but instead gets his thumbs broken for the trouble. Kramer breaks up with George on behalf of Allison. Elaine makes it through the morning meeting. Mike gets trapped in Jerry’s trunk. Elaine and Jerry, in his car, decide it would be best to eliminate “Susie.” George reconciles with Kramer. Elaine delivers the eulogy at “Susie’s” wake, much to the confusion of Peggy. Kramer, with George, makes a spectacular entrance at the ball. Mike escapes from Jerry’s trunk and accuses him of murder. The same fate befalls Elaine that befell George; Peterman puts her in charge of a foundation in “Susie’s” honor.

Jerry’s girlfriend, Ellen, seems perfect in every way, but everyone else seems to have a problem with her. George interviews candidates for the Foundation’s first scholarship. The candidates seem over-qualified, until one comes in who is a lot like he was. Elaine is going to ghost write Peterman’s biography. Kramer goes to Lorenzo’s pizza, where he has an encounter with the Van Buren boys. He accidentally flashes their gang sign and saves himself. Peterman wants his day to day life covered in his bio; the exotic adventures are for the catalog. His day-to-day life is very boring. She tells him about Kramer’s encounter with the gang and he suggests buying the story for his biography. George’s scholar makes a change in his plans that causes George to disqualify him from the scholarship. Kramer sells Peterman all of his stories for $750 dollars. Elaine is put at his disposal. To Elaine, Kramer’s stories aren’t much more interesting. George and Kramer perform an intervention on Jerry’s relationship with Ellen. George’s scholar joins the Van Buren boys, who apply pressure on George to get the scholarship back. Elaine tells Kramer that he can no longer tell his stories, since they now belong to Peterman. Elaine tries to embellish Kramer’s stories, but Peterman finds the rewrites “”too clichéd and obvious.”” She tells him the real Kramer story that he finds much more interesting. He tells Kramer he can have his stories back. George tries to save himself from the Van Buren boys. Jerry flies his parents in to get their impression of Ellen. He begins to see the light.

George has trouble thinking of a comeback to a comment made by Reilly; he does think of one, but it’s a little to late. Jerry buys a new tennis racket from a supposed professional. Elaine and Kramer discuss video picks. Elaine prefers picks by Vincent. He prefers picks by Gene or his own. He watches his latest pick and it makes him concerned about spending the rest of his life in a coma. Elaine is intrigued when she receives a phone call from the mysterious Vincent. Jerry discovers that the tennis pro is a hack player. George comes up with what he thinks is the perfect line and will listen to no one else’s opinion. Kramer makes a living will, with Elaine as the executor. The tennis pro, fearing he will be exposed, tries to bribe Jerry, including a rendezvous with his wife. Elaine opts for another movie and makes Vincent angry. George finds out that Reilly doesn’t work for the Yankees anymore, so he tracks him down to Ohio, where he plans to deliver his line. Kramer finishes the movie he rented and discovers it is possible to recover from a coma, he decides to change his will. Milos’ wife has no respect for him; he asks Jerry to let him beat him in tennis. Elaine receives a phone call from Vincent and she convinces him to let her meet him. She is surprised by his appearance. Kramer goes into a coma after being hit with tennis balls. Meanwhile, in Akron, George delivers his line about “the jerk store.”

Jerry’s parents sell the Cadillac to Jack Klompus for $6000 in order to give Jerry some money to help him out. They along with Kramer suggest that Jerry might try a career move. Elaine talks about her Peterman stock options and buys George’s coffee. He thinks she is sticking it to him. Jerry and George talk about the money their parents might have. This piques George’s interest. Kramer seeks advice from Elaine about his girlfriend’s post-sex bed habit “she’s got the jimmy legs.” Jerry flies to Florida to buy the Cadillac back. George seeks information on his family’s health history. Kramer works out a deal with his girlfriend. Jerry meets with Klompus and agrees to pay $14,000 for it. George anticipating a big inheritance begins to spend money. Unfortunately for him, so do his parents. Klompus has a problem with the car and Jerry returns to Florida. Jerry’s parents are still worried about him and wonder what to do. Morty decides to see Elaine about a job; she reluctantly agrees to give him a job, just as Peterman returns. Kramer, fearing a prowler (Jerry’s dad), decides he can no longer sleep alone; unfortunately his girlfriend has decided she can. So he moves in with the Costanzas, who tell George that they are moving to Florida. Elaine returns to her regular position at Peterman, with no options. George and Elaine try to discuss their respective problems. Still in Florida, strapped for cash and credit, Jerry sleeps in the Cadillac. Kramer and Emily spend the night as an old married couple in the Costanzas’ house. The Seinfelds make a change in their housing as the Costanzas try to settle into their new place.

Everyone makes a comment about a bad check of Jerry’s that is on display at Marcelino’s store. Through the Foundation, George gets the opportunity to visit a women’s prison. He is disappointed when the facility doesn’t meet his impression of what he thinks a women’s prison is. He does however meet a convict that he decides to ask out. He enjoys the liberation that dating a convict offers. Kramer gets a new pet, a rooster that he names “Little Jerry Seinfeld”; of course he really wanted a hen for the eggs. Jerry’s parents find out about the check and offer to send money. Elaine finds out her bald boyfriend once had a fine head of hair. She convinces him to start growing it back, but when he does he shows signs of hair-loss. He begins to feel despondent. George’s dream relationship hangs on the brink, Celia’s up for parole. Kramer enters “Little Jerry” in a cockfight that if he wins, Jerry’s bad check will be taken down. George is a character witness for Celia’s parole hearing; he testifies to try keeping her in. Jerry’s bad check doesn’t come down, because Marcelino wants Jerry to do something for him first. Kurt seeks hair-loss advice from George that causes him to propose to Elaine. Jerry and Kramer train “Little Jerry” for the big cockfight. George experiences “fugitive sex” when Celia breaks out after her parole was denied. Celia is tracked down and Kurt is mistaken for George. Marcelino brings a ringer in for the big fight; Kramer tries to save “Little Jerry” but pays the price.

George is excited about the new apartment he is going to move into. Elaine is on a blind date, now called a “set-up.” Jerry takes Kramer to his self-storage where they discover that Newman has been hiding bags of mail. George finds out he can’t get his apartment because the tenant association is going to give it to an Andrea Doria survivor. Elaine is told her date won’t be making it because he’s been stabbed. She is aroused by the situation. Kramer’s cold is getting bad and he’s not going to the doctor, they botched his vasectomy, he’s more potent now than ever. Jerry tries to get Newman to get rid of the mail; however, he’s not interested because he didn’t get the transfer to Hawaii. Kramer finds a dog with a cold that he volunteers to take to the vet, so he can get medicine for their colds. Elaine meets her blind date who gets coffee thrown in his face from another ex-girlfriend. She discovers his problem is that he is a “bad breaker upper.” George confronts his rival for the apartment and decides to wage war. Elaine’s blind date breaks up with her and tells she has “a big head.” From a suggestion by Jerry, George asks for a hearing with the association and tells them the story of his life. Jerry forms “an alliance” with Newman that will hopefully get him out of his life forever. Jerry tries to get Kramer to take his medication. He discovers that Kramer is taking dog medication and beginning to exhibit the signs of being a dog. The big head comment begins to hold true for Elaine and she makes a comment about jamming “a fork in his forehead.” Jerry tries to take Kramer to a real doctor. After Kramer bites Newman’s ankle, Jerry offers to deliver the rest of his mail. He is too efficient for the post office. Elaine meets up with her blind date and makes good on her promise. Kramer saves the day. George and the survivor don’t get the apartment.

George’s girlfriend has mononucleosis and he can’t have sex with her for six weeks. Elaine’s met a doctor who’s almost gotten his license to practice. Jerry agrees to appear at career day at his former junior high school, first he is bumped and then there is a fire drill. Kramer lights up a cigar in Monk’s and is asked to leave. He meets others on the street who face his dilemma so he opens up his apartment as a smoking lounge. Jerry’s agent gets him an assembly at the school. George’s lack of sex makes his mind sharper. Elaine learns how much her doctor boyfriend doesn’t know about medicine. She uses George’s technique to help him study to get his license, but in the process she becomes an idiot. Jerry struggles to figure out how to fill two hours in front of a junior high crowd. George uses his new found intellect to give batting advice, speaks Portuguese and prepares a presentation for Jerry’s assembly. Kramer sees his lawyer about a case against the tobacco company, smoking has destroyed his looks. He gets a settlement without Jackie’s input. George calculates the odds of scoring with a Portuguese waitress. Elaine’s boyfriend gets his license and leaves her sexless.

George reveals a strategy to guarantee a second date with women – leaving an object behind at their place. However, this strategy gets Elaine into trouble, when George leaves behind a sable hat she shouldn’t have charged to the Peterman expense account. Meanwhile, the red neon sign of a new Kenny Rogers Roasters restaurant beams directly into Kramer’s apartment. Jerry and Kramer then switch apartments, and end up switching personalities as well.

Elaine’s new boyfriend, Brett, is obsessed with designer furniture and the song “Desperado.” Jerry spots an umbrella salesman using the sales technique he invented. The salesman says it was someone else. Hundreds of twelve-cent royalty checks keep arriving from Jerry’s brief appearance on a Japanese television. Kramer warns George that the carpet cleaners he hired are actually a front for a religious cult. Intrigued, George tries to be converted, but they’re not interested. Kramer meets some Japanese businessman and he takes them on the town and to the cleaners. He is a little confused about the exchange rate. Brett delivers a large chest of drawers to Kramer and thinks that Jerry might be jealous. Kramer thinks the TV pilot that Jerry and George did would be perfect for Japanese television. They pitch it to a couple of Japanese TV executives. Elaine tries to find a song that she and Brett can share. Kramer puts his Japanese friends up at his place. They’re sleeping in the chest of drawers. Jerry caught in the rain meets the man in the street that claims credit for the twirl. He also meets Brett who is convinced Jerry is down on his luck. George gets the cleaners to do the offices at Yankee Stadium where they find a new recruit. Because of the humidity from the hot tub, Kramer’s guests get stuck in the chest. Jerry, with writer’s cramp from check signing, uses a fire ax to open the chest. That scares the Japanese guests and injures Brett who passes out.

Jerry is intrigued by the concept of his girlfriend having a mentor. George prepares to give a lecture on risk management by reading a book, but realizes that books on tape have spoiled him. Elaine prepares to fire an employee, but when face to face with him, she promotes him. Kramer runs a Jewish singles night at Frank’s Knights of Columbus hall. Jerry meets his girlfriend’s mentor, but she is dating Kenny Bania. George discovers the blind can get any book on tape, so he plans to fail an eye test. Elaine’s recently promoted employee has some startling new ideas. She plans to promote him again. Kramer’s party plans go awry when he has to cook for over 150 plus people. He needs to get Frank’s advice on cooking for the masses, despite George’s warning. Elaine’s promotional plan backfires, when the rest of her staff quits. Jerry’s girlfriend sees Bania’s act and loses respect for her mentor. Elaine tries working with her employee. George figures out an angle to get his book read. Jerry finds himself becoming Bania’s mentor. Jerry and his now ex-girlfriend get their files mixed up; George speaks on Ovaltine and Bania on risk management. Frank’s cooking skills are reborn, until he sees someone choking.

Elaine has a rash and looks for a doctor who will treat her; despite her doctor — patient relationship reputation. Kramer offers Jerry a method to get a refund on his stereo that is two years out of warranty. George discovers the woman at the photo store is looking at his pictures. Jerry refuses delivery of a package with no return address. George thinks that the photo store clerk has stuck a revealing picture of herself in with his pictures. Kramer convinces George to return the compliment and offers to take the photos. Uncle Leo signs for Jerry’s package. Elaine tries to lift her medical records. Jerry lets Uncle Leo open the package and there is the sound of an explosion. Leo’s stove has exploded but eventually Jerry gets the package and opens it up. It contains his stereo in pieces. Kramer sent the package to him insured; now all they must do is collect the insurance money from the post office. Elaine poses as Uncle Leo’s nurse to try a diagnosis for her condition. When that doesn’t work she tries to get Kramer to lift her records. Newman grills Jerry on suspicion of mail fraud. George drops off his film at the photo store and gets a surprising result.

Elaine reluctantly lets George attend a party she is throwing at work. “Sweet fancy Moses” exclaims George when he sees Elaine dance at a party she’s holding for her employees. She wonders why they’ve lost respect for her. Jerry gets 2 tickets to a premiere of a film. Kramer asks him to get an extra ticket for his friend Brody. Elaine thinks the loss of respect might be due to George’s influence, so she makes him off limits to Anna, one of the women George talked to at the party. That “bad boy” image makes him all the more desirable. Jerry and Kramer attend the film with Brody, who begins to make a bootleg tape. Brody gets sick and has Kramer take him home, leaving Jerry to finish making the tape. Jerry worries about the implications when Brody likes him camera work and asks him to do another film. However, he complains about the quality of Kramer’s work. Elaine finds out the truth about her dancing after she tapes herself. Elaine apologizes to Anna and George, which suddenly makes him undesirable. Brody won’t meet Jerry’s demands for equipment; George takes on the challenge, but gets arrested. Frank comes to bail him out and Elaine lets him know the truth about his son. Elaine’s dance becomes a big hit on the streets of New York.

Kramer uses a bathroom in an office building and just begins working there. He is “TCB.” Elaine sets Jerry up with a friend who is very beautiful, but she has “man hands.” George uses a picture of her and passes her off as his dead finance Susan; that gets him into the “Forbidden City” where high priced models hang out. Elaine meets Kevin and some of his friends; they are the exact opposite of Jerry, George and Kramer. With Kramer working, George inside the walls and Elaine hanging out with Kevin, Jerry begins to feel alone.

George thinks the foundation lawyer thinks he might have killed Susan, Jerry suggests using a method employed by Jerry Lewis to find out. Kramer falls for Jerry’s girlfriend and he consults Newman for advice. Elaine’s friends insist that she have a baby, she’d rather not and meets a man who shares her ideals. George leaves a running tape recorder in his brief case at the next board meeting and leaves the room. He returns to find the briefcase damaged and the tape stopped. Newman gets in the middle of Jerry and Kramer’s relationship with Pam; he bribes Jerry in hopes to find out more about his obsession, Elaine. Meanwhile, her new boyfriend gets a vasectomy to show her how committed he is to not having children. The guys find out Pam isn’t interested in having children and they line up for their own vasectomies. George gets to the bottom of what happened to his briefcase.

Months after her death, George is ready to move on, but Susan’s parents want to keep her memory alive. Kramer becomes a karate master, where his opponents are equals in his skill level, but are lacking in size. Jerry runs into Dolores, you remember “her name rhymed with a female body part” in “The Junior Mint,” she suggests that they get together again. Peterman has a breakdown and goes to Burma leaving Elaine in charge; a position she is reluctant to assume. Kramer makes a speech that inspires Elaine to go and take charge of J. Peterman. Inspired by a comment that Jerry made, a foundation is established in Susan’s name, which will take up all of George’s free time. Jerry and Dolores do get together; however, when she hears why Jerry’s engagement was broken off, she leaves commenting that he still hasn’t matured. Elaine sees Kramer’s opponents, vents her frustration and takes him down in front of the class. Jerry decides to research breakups and the effect on future relationships. Kramer’s classmates meet him after class. George discovers everything he lost when he lost Susan.

As the big day grows nearer, George and Susan order their invitations. Susan lets him choose the cheap ones. George tries to think of a way out. Elaine suggests smoking and Kramer suggests a pre-nuptial agreement. Jerry, thinking of a single future with Kramer, nearly gets hit by a car but is saved by his female equivalent, Jeannie. Jerry thinks he is in love with Jeannie. Kramer tries to cash in on a bank’s offer of a $100 if one of their tellers doesn’t say hello. Is “Hey,” hello? George tries the suggestions and strikes out. Susan begins preparing the invitations. Jerry makes a decision. Susan passes out while licking envelopes. Jerry proposes marriage; later he has second thoughts. George finds Susan and the gang meets him over at the hospital, where George gets the news, he’s out. Free at last, George makes another attempt at Marisa Tomei.

After George makes an off-hand remark to a married couple with a rocky relationship, Jerry and Elaine wait in anticipation of their inevitable separation. Elaine sports a new hairstyle, starts driving again and almost makes Jerry car sick. Kramer starts wearing jeans again. The jeans are much too tight, so tight in fact, that he can’t get them off when he really needs to. Elaine and Jerry make plans to move in on the separated couple, which they do. George feels guilty about breaking up the marriage and wishes to undo the damage. Jerry and Elaine physically oppose this action. David returns the off-hand remark to George in the presence of Susan. She tells George she has to think about some things- he thinks it is his ticket out.

Wilhelm is delighted with the job George did on the project; however, he has no idea what he did or how he did it. The detective on the case thinks he’s found Jerry’s car, damaged beyond recognition. It’s not, and later Jerry’s mechanic calls him from the car. Kramer spots Jerry’s car in Ohio. Steinbrenner calls George into his office about the project report and has him committed. Kramer ditches the cans, bottles, mailbags and Newman in pursuit of Jerry’s car. Newman finds a farmer’s house, complete with the proverbial daughter. The mechanic throws the clubs and bag at Kramer’s truck, allowing him to get away. Deena is happy to see that George is getting the help he needs. Peterman is stunned when he finally gets the clubs, “Elaine, I never knew Kennedy had such a temper.”

George doesn’t hear the details on an important project that Wilhelm wants him to champion. Peterman wants Elaine to bid on a set of golf clubs at the Kennedy auction, her ceiling is $10,000; however, she gets into a bidding war with Sue Ellen, the Oh Henry! candy heiress. Consequently, she spends a bit more than she was authorized. Newman finds the missing ingredient to make it cost effective in Kramer’s scheme to collect used pop bottles and cans and take them to Michigan where the refund is doubled. Jerry takes his car to a mechanic, who’s fanatical about car care. Elaine meets Jerry to get the golf clubs out of his car, but the mechanic, distraught over Jerry’s negligence, steals it. Kramer and Newman collect their bottles and cans and hit the road in a mail truck.

George becomes Steinbrenner’s pet, when he shares an eggplant calzone with him. Kramer is raving about wearing clothes “straight out of the dryer.” Jerry thinks that Elaine’s boyfriend is dating her without really ever asking her out. He offers to bring Jerry some Cuban cigars from Canada. Jerry takes advantage of his girlfriend’s ability to get anything she wants. Kramer searches for quarters for the dryer; when he can’t find anymore, he starts using an oven. George gets into tip trouble with the counter guy at the calzone shop and he works out an arrangement with Newman. That is unless of course it’s raining (Newman doesn’t deliver mail in the rain); Kramer helps out.

Jerry uses Elaine to prove that a sales clerk is wrong about his looking at an expensive jacket. Elaine is picked up by the clerk. George has an unwanted house guest, a wig master for the touring company of “Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat.” He also has found a parking lot that charges $75 dollars a month; Kramer decides to put his car there. Unfortunately, he leaves his apartment key there. When he can’t get his key, he is allowed to borrow a pink Cadillac. Jerry is convinced the clerk is working Elaine. George discovers why the lot is so cheap, he finds a used condom in his car and is asking a prostitute for information, just as Susan approaches. George discovers that he may have an out with Susan; she says she must be able to trust him and have no doubts. Kramer stays at Jerry’s apartment. Elaine has a walking stick she lets Kramer have. Jerry tries to return his jacket, but discovers that “spite” isn’t a viable reason. Kramer is allowed to borrow the back up “Electric Color Dreamcoat.” Jerry is put out, when both sexes assume he isn’t in a relationship with the person he is with (Elaine in one instance, the Wig Master in the other). Kramer finds a fuzzy white hat. With all the parts put together, his new ensemble is a sight to behold, just ask the NYPD after he is caught pulling a prostitute out of his borrowed car.

George is happy because he has a three-month reprieve. The wedding is delayed until June (just in time for the end of the May sweeps and a cliffhanger!). Meanwhile he is also excited because Jerry is going to go out with Susan’s best friend. He envisions their friendship in the future as being “Gatsby”-like. Jerry is trying to get into the Friars Club, but loses a jacket he “borrowed” for dinner there, at a performance of comedic jugglers that was “worked on” by Susan’s friend. Kramer tries to duplicate the sleeping patterns of Da Vinci and falls asleep at some inopportune moments; one of which puts him put in the Hudson River. Peterman hires a deaf employee and Elaine suffers the consequences, when she gets loaded with some of his work. Trying to see how deaf he really is, Elaine comes on to him, which Peterman overhears and tries to help out their budding relationship.

Susan’s old roommate from college, Sally Weaver, gives Jerry a package that she wants him to be careful with; which he is, but he loses his own package in the process. Frank tells George he is turning his room into a billiard room. Elaine tells Frank about a man she saw in Tuscany who looks just like him, Frank thinks it may be the cousin who stayed behind. Kramer challenges him to a game where the space is a bit tight. Jerry is enthusiastic about a new toothbrush, which he is convinced Elaine must have. Susan has a doll that looks uncannily like George’s mother; she doesn’t believe it, but he does and it affects his performance. Jerry is going to be on Charles Grodin’s show with one of the Three Tenors, not Pavarotti or Domingo, but “the other guy.” Elaine goes with him the studio, to replace an autographed picture of “the other guy,” for “the Maestro” that was damaged while they were in Tuscany. “The Maestro” provides a new fashion for Kramer and Frank while playing pool, and his baton is an answer to the space problem in the billiard room. Susan’s roommate comes to town. She tries to help Jerry out by bringing him back a better barbecue sauce and bringing a doll to the studio for Jerry, which in her opinion, is much funnier than the one Jerry wanted. Jerry has no material for his appearance.

Elaine gets a physical for a pending trip with Peterman to Africa. Her physical test results show positive for opium, so Peterman fires her. Jerry’s parent are in seclusion in New York while biding time until they can move back to Florida. George tries to convince his parents to move to Florida. The shower heads in Jerry’s building are being replaced with a new low-flow model; Newman finds a source for black market shower heads. The Seinfelds tell the Costanzas that there is no room for them in Florida that gives Frank all the incentive he needs to move. George is delighted. Elaine finds the cause of her opium addiction and finds a donor for her next physical. Jerry makes a joke on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno at the expense of Uncle Leo and he pays the price for making fun of the family.

Kramer continues to play with the cable guy. George’s obsession with Marisa makes Susan suspicious. Elaine calls Jerry in Florida and tells him she wants to come and join him. Elaine gets George Marisa’s phone number and now he needs her for an alibi (which involves her “boyfriend” Art Vandelay, an importer/ exporter). Morty’s ace in the hole, to keep him from impeachment, is the woman that Jerry stole the marble rye from, only she doesn’t remember him, at least at first. The cable guy zeros in on Kramer, but he gets away. George’s meeting with Marisa doesn’t go as well as planned and Susan thinks he’s having an affair with Elaine. The cable guy concedes defeat.

Jerry surprises his parents by buying them a new Cadillac, when his last job really pays well. Kramer, who now knows how much Jerry makes, says it will change their relationship. It certainly changes his relationship with Elaine, she’s interested again. George reconsiders his engagement when one of Elaine’s friends tells him that she could have set him up with Oscar winning actress, Marisa Tomei. The cable company wants to see Kramer and he takes the opportunity to get revenge on them. George wants to meet Marisa for a cup of coffee, even when Elaine’s friend is in the hospital with a heart condition. Jack Klompus accuses Morty of embezzling funds to pay for his new Cadillac.

Elaine sees a girl’s bike she wants, but she strains her neck trying to getting the bike down from the wall. In pain she promises the bike to whoever fixes her neck. Kramer saves the day and wants the bike. George is angry when Susan’s cousin chooses to name her baby with the name he planned to give his first offspring. He desperately tries to convince them to use another name. Kramer works out an arrangement with Jerry to keep track of what he takes from Jerry’s kitchen. Jerry is curious when his girlfriend is always wearing the same dress, every time they go out.