A struggling pulp fiction writer who doubles as an incompetent jewel thief. He gets caught in the act every time, but he uses his looks and charm to make the best of it. Soon he becomes a celebrity. Wealthy women start leaving their jewels out like milk and cookies for Santa Claus in hopes that the sex thief will unlawfully invade their domiciles.

While dabbling in Satanism, Count Karstein resurrects Mircalla Karnstein who initiates him into vampirism. As a rash of deaths afflicts the village, Gustav the head of Puritan group leads his men to seek out and destroy the pestilence. One of his twin nieces has become inflicted with the witchcraft but Gustav’s zeal and venom has trapped the innocent Maria, threatening her with a tortuous execution, whilst Frieda remains free to continue her orgy of evil.

At the beginning of the 1913 Mexican Revolution, greedy bandit Juan Miranda and idealist John H. Mallory, an Irish Republican Army explosives expert on the lam from the British, fall in with a band of revolutionaries plotting to strike a national bank. When it turns out that the government has been using the bank as a hiding place for illegally detained political prisoners — who are freed by the blast — Miranda becomes a revolutionary hero against his will.